Current Edition | Term 4, Week 6

Finding Calm in the Countdown: Managing Overwhelm as Exams Approach

When the jacarandas are in full bloom across Brisbane, is it a signal that exams are upon us. At this time, many students begin to feel the weight of expectation, pressure, and uncertainty. Even the most well-prepared learners can be stressed. At St Laurence’s College, we want our young men to know that experiencing pressure is normal; but feeling overwhelmed doesn’t have to be their default state.

Brené Brown offers a helpful distinction in Atlas of the Heart:

“Stressed is being in the weeds. Overwhelmed is being blown.”

She defines overwhelm as “an extreme level of stress, an emotional and/or cognitive intensity to the point of feeling unable to function.” It’s the moment when clear thinking feels impossible and even simple next steps seem out of reach.

This mirrors what many students experience leading into exams: the sense that everything is happening faster than they can process. Yet, overwhelm is not a sign of inadequacy: it’s a signal that the mind and body need a pause, a reset and a pathway back to calm.

Slow the Spotlight of Attention

When students feel “blown,” their attention jumps between dozens of competing thoughts. One of the most effective antidotes is narrowing focus to a single moment: their breath, their posture or the immediate task at hand.

Encourage them to take one slow breath, drop their shoulders, unclench the jaw and soften their attention. This lowers physiological stress and clears mental space.

Remember: You Don’t Need to Fix Everything at Once

Overwhelm makes students believe they must be complete ready for the exam in one sitting. In truth, success comes one step at a time: one paragraph revised, one practice question completed, one page of notes reviewed.

Bringing focus back to the present moment reduces anxiety and builds momentum.

Use Grounding Tools

Grounding techniques help bring students back into the here and now when the mind is flooded. They can try:

• Planting both feet firmly on the ground
• Noticing one thing they can touch, one thing they can see, one thing they can hear
• Describing those sensations quietly in their mind

This reconnects them to a sense of control and steadiness.

Challenge the Narrative, Not Yourself

Overwhelm often comes with a harsh internal script:

“I can’t keep up,” “Everyone else is coping better,” “I’m not ready.”

But these thoughts are rarely facts. They are stories the brain tells under pressure. Encourage your son to shift the narrative to something grounded and achievable:

• “What is one thing I can influence right now?”
• “What support will help me take the next step?”

This small reframing restores agency and reduces cognitive load.

Prioritise “Non-Doing Time”

Life often moves faster than our minds and bodies can manage. Short pockets of “non-doing time” – a quiet walk, mindful breathing, a moment outdoors, time with family or pets - give the nervous system essential recovery. I recently heard Dr. Young give a past student, now at university, the advice that the best way to de-stress before an exam is to play some music!

These pauses don’t set students back; they make the studying that follows far more effective.

Know When to Bring Energy Up or Down

Some students need to calm down; others need energising.

Slower breathing and grounding help reduce heightened stress, while brisk walking, upbeat music or fresh air can lift motivation when the tank feels empty.

When young people can recognise and adjust their energy state, this is a valuable life skill.

Taking the Next Step

As exams approach, we want our young men to know: they are capable, they are not alone, and they can move through this season with courage and steadiness. If additional support is needed, our admin teachers, Heads of House, counsellors, and classroom teachers are ready to help.

References

Brown, B. (2021). Atlas of the Heart. Random House.
Smith, J. (2023). Open When: Letters of Advice for Modern Stress. Penguin.